Every day is sluggish as I fight in my republic
The woman that I’m lovin’, I can’t put the mic above it
Even at times I wish I could, my mind ain’t fuckin’ budgin’
Too stubborn and persistent, this must be my punishment
For showin’ total devotion, bein’ real with true emotion
If I end up jaded, fuck it, at least I’ll still be flowin’
At this point, it’s all I got, I’m in control, I call the shots
I set the dates and my heart doesn’t get battered with all these rocks
Flyin’ from the road as the traction catches and I roll
If there’s one thing that I know, it’s that I got the purest soul
Simple and plain to see, I deserve better than this pain that anguishes me
If I keep goin’ this route, I worry it’ll extinguish any flame in me
But defeat can’t be accepted, even if I seem neglected
Whenever shit gets hectic, I submerge in the past, reflectin’
Optimism, see the joy, ignore the suffering, keep the void
That’s in my heart so I appreciate every moment when redeployed
Into the wasteland that is heartbreak, I politic and parlay
The negotiations always freeze at the edges like a large lake
I used to think it was worth it, now my mind keeps screaming stop
I think I’m at my melting point, the temperature’s burnin’ too hot
For me to handle even with oven mitts, someone blow out the candle
Snuff it, pull the wick out, cut the wax, completely dismantle
If that’s what it takes for me to heal, to finally recuperate
Maybe it’s a necessary step, a leap of faith I need to make